I think its bullshit when I hear people say they didn't have time to talk to their significant other.
Taking a break in a long distance relationship full#
I am a full believer that if you want to talk to someone, you will make time to do so. We didn't go one day through all of college without talking to each other. You’ll miss fun opportunities and potential friends if you dwell and sulk about how you aren’t with your significant other. Take advantage of that, and do the things that you otherwise probably wouldn’t do it your boyfriend or girlfriend were with you. Once you are done with distance, chances are you will never be as independent than you will be now. It is arguably more important, however, to make the most out of the time you are spending by yourself.Ĭhances are if you are investing into a LD relationship you see a future with the person. It is so important to make the most of the short amount of time you are together. It's really allll about mindset.īen - Enjoy your time alone and enjoy your time together. Instead of being sad about being Ben being gone, I started appreciating it. I can make those other people in my life really feel how special they are to me. I can do whatever I want on a Friday and Saturday night. I can give my full attention to my girlfriends and family. I changed my mindset and thought about how I am planning on being with Ben for the rest of my life and these last three years are the only time I'll be able to be fully independent. I was missing huge parts of my freshman year because I was always just so upset about not being with ben. I knew after freshman year that I couldn't live being that sad about ben being gone. Second one, APPRECIATE YOUR INDEPENDENCE. I would purposely try to go to the last places we went before he left because I constantly would be like "last time I was at this grocery store was with ben" and if I just ripped the bandaid off I was fine. Once I got into my routine again, things were back to normal and it wasnt as hard. But also, by senior year the end was in sight whereas during freshman year four years seemed so far away.īut even for visiting, the day he left was always the hardest. By senior year, it was "normal" and I was 100% okay with being in a long distance. By sophomore and junior year I was still really sad about it but I was fine.
The first year (freshman year) was the worst. If you are in a long distance and don't have an end date, I'm sorry!! I don't know if I would have been able to handle that haha. Once that four years was over, we never had to be apart for a long period of time ever again. Having that end date gave us something to work towards. We knew that this was a 4-year, temporary, thing. Butttt, I also picked going to school near my house for this reason (not the only reason but it was definitely part of my decision making). I definitely would not have been able to see Ben as much if it wasn't for that. Plus, I was broke and wouldn't have had the money to pay for gas haha. It was 8 hours away so having them drive and not me was SUPER nice.
I went to college near where I grew up so I could easily drive up with them when they went to watch him play. All get to the worst thing later on in the post, but it was REALLY nice that he played soccer at college because his parents went to a lot of his games. This was the best thing and the worst thing about our long distance. Everywhere I would go I would always think, "Last time I drove on this road I was with Ben" or "Last time I went to Target, Ben was with me" like irrational things like that haha. Which is hard to believe from this post, but seriously, I rarely cry. So funny thinking back on it now but in the moment I thought life was horrible hahaha.Īny time I would visit him after that even if I wasn't super sad about leaving him (no offense Ben ) I would get this clump in my throat and the tears would just start coming. We pulled away from his dorm room and I was in the backseat of his parents car just silently sobbing and his dad was trying to give me a pep talk in the front seat. Actually the whole first year in general was rough. The weekend we dropped him off for that first year was ROUGH. We really tried to make that last week memorable. We planned something exciting for every day leading up to his departure like going hiking, going to Chicago, having a picnic, etc. Needless to say, we were slight emotional disasters. The week before he left for his freshman year we made a "last week bucket list" in his living room and bawled while his brother was in the other room hahaha. So, the thought of us only seeing each other once a month was impossible to imagine.īen played soccer in college so he always left for school way earlier than all of our friends. We hung out like every single day (which I'll get to why long distance was actually super good for us because of this). I feel like it's important to mention that Ben and I were the couple that did everything together.
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